While walking through Walmart yesterday, I felt an overwhelming sadness for how tough life is and how much suffering there are in this world. It doesn’t matter who you are (rich, poor, pretty, ugly…etc), you can’t escape it. I turned to B and said “I’ve been thinking about pursuing monkhood. What do you think about it?”
“I expect nothing less from a nut job like you.” *grins*
“LOL. No really.”
“The stuff that comes out of your mouth is crazy. You’re a complete nut job.” *shakes head while grinning*
While at lunch, I told him that I want a little house by the water with a huge library. I don’t care to live anywhere fancy. I don’t care what job I have. I guess my need for seclusion is at an all time high. When we got home, he started to browse for houses near bodies of water. I was really touched by it. He’s afraid of living near the ocean but here he was, looking at homes by the water.
I climbed on top of him and asked for the millionth times, “Do you love me?”
“YES. Stop asking the same question.”
“Never. I’m gonna ask until the day you die. Just keep saying yes until I no longer feel the need to ask anymore.”
*sigh* “OK. I love you.”
As much as monkhood is calling me, I’m not ready to leave this man for it.